How to quickly get in sync with someone

by Anne M. Bachrach

The Power of pacing.
A skill required throughout the entire client development process is the skill to get in step, or get back into step, with prospects and clients, either on the phone or face-to-face throughout the life of the relationship.

The first step toward building trust.
As a successful business person we must get in step with our prospects and clients by being like them. This creates feelings of trust and rapport and actually helps us empathize. Stephen Covey, in his book "7 Habits of Highly Effective People," describes empathic listening as listening with the eyes, ears, and heart. Empathic listening is listening for feeling and for meaning. It is listening to understand, not just listening to respond. One way to accomplish this is with Pacing. While this sounds very simple, developing this skill requires practice and a commitment to be truly client-focused.

You will find this strategy is much faster and more predictable than using the old "Personality Styles" approach (ie: Driver, Sociable, Thinker, Amiable.). It is a lot easier to remember to do also.

In its' simplest form, the essence of pacing is to go at their pace: slow, medium or fast. If the prospect goes slow, you go slow. If they go fast, you go fast, etc. When people operate at a much faster/slower pace than us it tends to make us feel uncomfortable (even possibly ansious or stifled).

One reason pacing is so powerful is because we tend to trust people who are like us. Many studies have been conducted by psychologists and other scientists of human behavior which support this observations.

       There are 3 main ways to physically pace.
         1. Mirroring = It looks like they are looking in a mirror.
         2. Matching = Pacing exactly what they are doing.
         3. Cross-over = Pacing with a different part of the body altogether.

What does it mean to "pace" someone physically? It means we act like they act, move like they move and even talk like they talk!

Pacing is...

The ultimate courtesy.
Demonstrates that you care.
Proves that you are truly client-driven.

“Listen and go at their pace.”

Anne M. Bachrach is President of A.M. Enterprises in San Diego, CA. Anne has 23 years of experience training and coaching. The objective is to do more business in less time through maximizing people's true potential, and ultimately leading them to an even better quality of life. For more information on our services and learning tools, and to take advantage of at least 9 FREE life quality resources, visit www.AccountabilityCoach.com or click this link (http://AccountabilityCoach.com/signupa). Begin with the 30-day self-study course and experience a more balanced and successful life (http://www.accountabilitycoach.com/bw/30dayStudyCourse.php).

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