Confidence. Some people have it aplenty. Others struggle to be and act confident. Others of us are in the middle of the road; we are confident in certain situations, and in others we take a backseat because we don’t trust ourselves enough to embrace confidence.
Having self-confidence is important in our personal and in our professional lives. Many of us, however, struggle to find it and use it. When you struggle with confidence, you find you continue to struggle to pull forth your self-confidence, and this lack of confidence can make it difficult for you to success or to inspire others toward success.
When you’re self-confident, you feel good about yourself, and your body responds by secreting hormones that give you a further boost. One way to boost confidence is to recall a time when you were at your most confident – that will help!
When you feel self-conscious, your confidence will lag. Determine why you’re self-conscious and take the necessary steps to alleviate that feeling. Learn more, take charge, talk with someone to help you gain confidence, so you can move forward.
Let’s explore five ways to help you build your self-confidence even more.
- Be aware of how you talk to yourself. If you criticize yourself and your actions, your confidence suffers. Challenge any assumptions you have, determine where you are, and in what circumstances you criticize yourself. Find ways to treat yourself to better self-talk.
- Keep a “negativity journal.” This may seem counterintuitive, but stick with me. When you feel negative about yourself or your abilities, write it down. Look at what you’ve written and determine whether it’s true. For example: I can’t talk in front of a group. Is that true? Of course, you CAN talk in front of a group, but you may be nervous or anxious about talking in front of a group. That is a different task entirely. Once you write down your self-defeating belief, you can move forward and find a way to defeat it. If you’re nervous to talk in front of a group, join Toastmasters, for example. Start small and practice on friends or colleagues. When you have to talk in front of a group, choose a topic about which you are fully confident.
- How do others see you? Do people come to you and ask for your advice? Do they seek your help with projects? When you’re dealing with low self-esteem and your confidence is lagging, write down your skills and those areas in which you are an expert. This will help you build confidence and know that even though you don’t know everything (and who does!) you are an expert in XYZ and that’s great!
A “Me File”, as I call it, is simply a place where you keep all the great comments people have said about you, your service, your staff, and your firm. You can keep an electronic document as well as a manila folder with cards or tangible things people have sent you. When you feel your confidence slipping to less than 100%, read all the great comments people have said about you over the years to get your confidence cup flowing over again. To download a simple way to track your glowing comments from clients and people who have worked with you, go to http://bit.ly/me-file.
- Your self-confidence comes from within. Yes, it’s nice to have validation from others, but your confidence is innate. You need to pull upon your own confidence reserves and KNOW that you have what it takes!
- Focus your attentions. If you’re struggling with confidence in your business, find an area about which you are truly passionate. Turn your energies into that project or topic and regain your confidence. Work on a project, meet or exceed a deadline, help a colleague with something he or she is struggling with, and you will feed and fill your self-confidence well.
While we don’t always embrace the “fake it until you make it” philosophy, there are those times when even if your confidence is lagging, you can draw from within and work toward projecting a confidence you may not truly feel right this minute. Confidence, like all emotions, ebbs and flows. Self-confidence comes from a job well done, a life well lived, and a knowledge of your skills and abilities.
How confident are you? When do you find your confidence lagging? What do you do when you’re struggling with self-confidence to get all the confidence you need to handle anything you need to handle?
Which of the five ways to help build self-confidence will you implement to help yourself?
For help with increasing your confidence, so you can create your ideal business and ideal life, reach out to me today to schedule your complimentary consultation.
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